Church Break-Up Playlist


About two years ago I went through a bad break-up. We had started drifting apart a year or so before we finally broke up. You know how that is, in your heart you know it's time to break up but you just cant bring yourself to do it. You feel like it would disrupt your life too much, you've invested so many years, you're comfortable so why mess that up.

Only you're miserable and you feel trapped and if your honest you're just not in-love anymore.

You realize you have to do it for your own health and sanity. Because, really, you stayed longer than you should have.

Through betrayal, abuse, lies, you stayed and defended your relationship to others but now the lights were on and you could stand what you saw no longer.

You had once been so in love, remember that? It wasn't always bad, so many good memories actually.  Hold on to those, deal with your pain and grief and move on.

That's where I was a couple of years ago.

My heart was broken.

And like with anything in life, there was a soundtrack to that break-up.

I would listen to these songs and drive and cry. I would listen to them on repeat, tweet & Instagram lyrics. Sometime the song would take me to a moment in time, sometime they helped me vent my anger, embrace by grief, express my pain, put words to my feelings, and sometime they helped me let go, look forward, and heal my heart.

But to this day, when I hear any of them, they take me back to certain feelings, events, people, they make me remember.

Now I'm glad I can only see that break-up faintly, getting smaller, in my rear view mirror.

Last year I was interviewed for a book about those of us who have left church. We are called "The Dones" the book just came out, it's called Church Refugees: Sociologists reveal why people are DONE with church but not their faith by Josh Packard Ph.D and Ashleigh Hope, I can't wait to read our stories.

Have you ever gone through a break-up with a church or the institution of "church"? With religion maybe? Did music help you? If so, what's on your church break-up playlist?


These are the songs on mine, they tell my story...


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