"Lady Like" my version vs. church version

Evangeline is in a summer program called Navigate. It's a church intern, bible training type thing. Anyway, the other day she came home telling me about what they learned that day. She said they had a class about how a lady should act. Well, heck, I have already taught her all that so I asked her what exactly they taught her. Here is what they told her and the way I have told her the exact same thing..

Church version: "When you bend over to pick up something, hold the neck line of your top so that nothing shows."

My version: "Hello!! Your boobs are about to show!"


Church version: "Always sit with your legs crossed or together."

My version: "Hey, no one wants a crotch shot! Close your legs!"


Church version: "Be careful if you wear low rise pants, hold the back of your pants if your bending and think the crack of your butt may show any."

My version: "say no to crack"


Church version: " Don't show your undergarments. Make sure your shirts cover your bra strap."

My version: "Uh, excuse me, why are you wearing that? You look like a hooker."


Church version: "Make sure your clothing is always modest, not too tight or provocative looking, but age appropriate".

My version: "Don't be showin' your goods, that's skanky".


Same message, different delivery, Redneck all the way baby!!

Comments

Hey I was in that luncheon class and found it funny because Raven looked over at me and smiled because yes I have told her all those things too. Sometimes in the same delivery as you and sometimes the way Crystal tells it. I am glad the girls were listening.
Hey I was in that luncheon class and found it funny because Raven looked over at me and smiled because yes I have told her all those things too. Sometimes in the same delivery as you and sometimes the way Crystal tells it. I am glad the girls were listening.
Elysa said…
Love it! I'll be telling my girls about it.

For that matter, I think I'll be telling a LOT of my mom friends AND youth group girls to read this! LOL!

You're a HOOT!!!!!
Anonymous said…
this was hilarious...made me laugh pretty hard! loved the post! im sure crystal could put it just like you if she weren't teaching it at church! haha!

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