That Funk Cloud
It came on slowly this time and settled longer than ever before. Deeper.
I don't do the depression thing. Sure, I've been depressed before. The entire year after Evangeline was diagnosed with Type one Diabetes, I got at least a couple hundred gray hairs and felt like I couldn't breath for months.
Other times I have felt attacked, like spiritual forces were jumping on my brain and digging their claws in. But I did some war fare, and got the victory.
But "being" depressed has never been an issue for me. So, I'm not sure where I am right now. I think it's just everything and nothing, you know what I mean?
There is always something, and event, some drama, a turn in life that takes it over the top and into the heart of the Funk cloud. This time is no different but I sure wish the Funk cloud would go away...sooner then later.
It's like just being around people is hard, it's an effort. Talking to them is work. And that is so not me. I love to talk. I feel like I have this huge sign on my head saying "look at me I'm depressed" YUCK!
So, Dean has been great. I can talk to him better then anyone in the world. Just typing that made tears well up. He really is my biggest fan, my greatest supporter and my best friend. I don't care that he cant quote me the book of Revelations, he shows me Jesus every day in how he loves me and that leads our home better then any religious talk could.
So, bummer I guess. Sorry. I will be back to my normal self soon. I'm praying, which consist of saying the word "help" and He does help. Praying for other people helps too. Been doing that. And I know God has a reason for the Funk Cloud visit...I know he doesn't want me to stay there.
Not Myself - John Mayer