"..the best of times the worst of times..."

That is a Charles Dicken's Quote. I used to love Dickens. He said that at the beginning of a Tale of Two Cities. I liked Oliver Twist better then Tale of Two Cities, go figure.

I have been without a computer for over a week. It's been both great and terrible.

So much life is happening that I want to blog about. Inside and out "some strange things are a-foot.." (another quote, this time from the movie, Bill and Tedd's Excellent Adventures).

I have started mentoring *Rachel, an ex drug addict, fresh from jail pregnant mother and God is showing me himself so much through this relationship. Last week I got to take a friend of hers, very similar life situation, to the doctors also. We are all going to Pamper Night on June 8th. I love that God put us together. Wow, is all I can say. Where some may think I am doing a "good" thing, I know God is doing a great and wonderful work in all of us and I am a recipient of the good thing.

Did I mention Rachael was raised in the foster system? Yea, God is moving.

Abel is loving the daily playing of Shoots and Ladders and the reading time. He's not talking about dieing anymore. I think the classical music I put on at bed time has helped him with his dreams. He says he doesn't remember them now, instead of that they were full of monsters. That is really good.

As a family we have scaled back on our volunteering so we can be at home more, together, reading, playing games and of course watching Sponge Bob, Abel's favorite TV show.

THIS is hard for me. I am not the stay home mom. Me, Dean and all my kids have always gone and volunteered together, we did After School, Friday Thrive, Baseball, basketball, Soccer, spent all day on Sunday at the Dream Center "doing" but now, we are not doing any of that. Even Sunday is gonna be a much shorter day. Sure, Abel always acted fine being there, busy, playing while we worked usually, but It's still not the same as connecting, bonding, attaching at home with your immediate family. It's hard to explain but what matters is we get it. We will do what is needed for him to be a full complete part of our family. I have no interest in raising an Orphan that we adopted. I want to raise my son. He's my son, Dean's son, Evangeline's brother, and Steele's brother. He was not our for 7 years, I get that, I know it will never be exactly the same as if he was, BUT I also know that my goal is for him to recognize and appreciate his past, but also to be able to let it go enough to embrace his future with us as his family. Yes, all of you that say "oh wow, he calls you mom?" he does because I am now..and forever.

I miss my computer terribly. It will be at least another week before we get one, maybe two weeks. I twittered a couple days ago that Evangeline said she liked us not having a computer cuz' I spent more time with them and didn't get mad when they talked to me. Some people got way to much "I told you so" joy out of that. I wonder how many gleeful "I told you so" people work away from home in an office where they have their computer time? How many of them are writers, researchers and advocate internationally for Orphan care through the Internet, from home, like I do? I know I spent too much time on the computer, but not as much as many would think and when I took the computer back I knew I would be without one for a while, I also knew I needed that time to jump start our new phase of connecting with Abel.

I'm learning not to Twitter everything...kinda.

So yea..the best of times the worst of times fits perfectly...

"Life's a garden Dig it!" (that quote is from the Movie Joe Dirt)


Karen said…
Funny, because I just started reading Great Expectations again two nights ago! Dickens is the man. I am definitely reading a Christmas Carole again this year. It's been over 20 years. I'll be glad when you are "back" on the net. Enjoy these times, though.
the Matt family said…
you are doing an amazing mom job- with a computer and without one. you are stepping back from things that bring you joy and purpose for the ULTIMATE purpose- being Jesus to your children.

we love and respect you tremendously. maybe a little less computer time would be good for us all- i am guilty of it, too.

you rock,
Eric doucet said…
You should never be ashamed of, nor try to explain why your doing what your doing for your family! Many many people miss this, they miss ministering to their family because they are ministering to "others" only you and God know what God wants you to do! Listen to him and only him and pray for the people who say anything negative!

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