The other day our neighbor brought back the cradle we had lent them last year when there baby Ella was born. It had been Steele's. We had forgotten to tell them we weren't getting Bradshaw.

Today I put it in Steele's room right where it was supposed to go. I know getting Bradshaw has been called off but I also think I will need the cradle for another baby before too long.

You know, I really thought I was doing God a favor."yes, God, I will sacrifice, take another Orphan, whatever you ask because I am so good." Yea, what a crock! I wasn't doing Him any favors! I was opening my heart to a blessing, a child to raise and love and show God too. God sure has a way of knocking us off our pedestal, even if we don't see we have put ourselves on one.

I don't feel slighted one bit by God. I still feel blessed to have opened my heart to Bradshaw. I still miss him. The thought of him still makes my arms ache.

C.S. Lewis said..the precious alabaster box which one must break over Jesus' feet is one's heart...The contents become perfume only when it is broken. While they are safe inside they are more like sewage."

No matter what my circumstances, I keep thinking about the lady living under a tree in Africa, (our Pastor Dino, told us about meeting her) just a bucket and a tarp to call her home, how could I complain? I cannot. I am blessed.


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