I can't seem to get my head around it..

..I keep telling myself "you are going to have another baby in a month and a half" but it just isn't sinking in. I don't know why. Maybe because Steele is still a baby. I feel overwhelmed with all that has to be done I feel like we are moving in slow motion when we need to be moving in fast motion.

I hate what stress does to me. I was a real witch a couple times last week. I repented to the injured parties but I just hate that I can't just not be that way. I know I have come a long way but I have far yet to go. I see Lorri, she is gentle and kind and her version of "Screaming at her kids" is way different then mine! I wish I screamed like her. I just have a self control issue, I always have. I was never taught self control in any area of my life so as a Christian that is something God has really had to start from scratch with. I wish I could think before I talk or scream at Dean or the kids. I pray daily for self control.

Ok, enough of the emotional pity party.

Dean and I both had a stomach bug yesterday. I don't know what we would have done had my niece not been there. I wont go into details but lets just say I lost a few pounds.

We took E to diabetes camp Sunday. She barely looked back at us when we left. She really loves going. I miss her already.

Next post will be all about E's birth day party last Friday night. I will post pics.

Pray for my freak outs and that I can get done what is needed for baby Bradshaw!


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